Can I help you?

At work this week I've been doing a bit of work with one of our call centre managers in preparation for my project to be rolled out later in the year. Then by chance I received an email from a friend with these call centre actual conversations.


Some have done the rounds before, some new. I thought you'd enjoy... 

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Customer:     'I've been ringing 0800 2100 for two days and can't get through to enquiries, can you help?'. 
Operator:     'Where did you get that number from, sir?'. 
Customer:     'It was on the door to the Travel Centre'. 
Operator:     'Sir, they are our opening hours'. 
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Samsung Electronics
Caller:          'Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?'
Operator:     'I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about'.
Caller:          'On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC  wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?'
Operator:      'I think you mean the telephone point on the wall'.
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RAC Motoring Services
Caller:          'Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am travelling in Australia ?'
Operator:      ' Doesn't the product name give you a clue?'
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Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while travelling in France ):
'If I register my car in France , do I have to change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?' 
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Directory Enquiries
Caller:               'I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff please'.
Operator:          'I'm sorry, there's no listing. Is the spelling correct?'
Caller:               'Well, it used to be called the Bargoed Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off'. 
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Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.
Operator:        'Woven? Are you sure?'
Caller:             'Yes. That's what it says on the label; Woven in Scotland '.
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On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator:
'I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on'. 
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Tech Support:      'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop'.
Customer:             'OK'..
Tech Support:      'Did you get a pop-up menu?'.
Customer:             'No'.
Tech Support:      'OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'
Customer:             'No'.
Tech Support:      'OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?'.
Customer:            'Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click''.
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Tech Support:          'OK. In the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?'
Customer:                 'Wow. How can you see my screen from there?' 
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Caller:  'I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just realised that I need it. If I turn my system clock back two weeks will I have my file back again?'.